I discovered something/someone/somewhere new today. Emilie Wapnick’s TEDx talk on multipotentialites. Which I am one. But I didn’t know it…or maybe I did know it but couldn’t fit it into my current world view. As a multipotentialite or, as Barbara Sher calls us, Scanners, well, I have many interests. I get bored after awhile. I’m recognizing now that whenever I feel burnout coming in the job, it’s not because of any personality flaw of mine. It’s not that I’m TOO caring or TOO whatever for the job. TOO sensitive. It’s not that at all. It’s because my brain is DONE with the learning of the situation/moment/job/season/RELATIONSHIP.
No longer will I feel overly responsible for not feeling satisfied. (Could be why I have chosen to stay single the past 7 years.) With my life. With my job. With my relationships. I refuse to feel there is anything WRONG with me for wanting change. I used to think it was because I was a Gemini and that it was a built-in personality thing, but I’m no longer convinced this is the case. I’m just who I am. I have multiple interests in life. I have held a number of different jobs. Not because I didn’t fit. I always fit in. At first. Then I get bored and, only recently realized, this means it’s time to move on.
An Issue of Commitment
In a world full of specialists – “know your niche”, “write for your niche”, “know your tribe”, “be inservice to your people” – well, that’s a lot of pressure for a multipod like myself to find my place in the world. Especially the online world. My tribe, my niche, if I define it by the people who are interested in the same things as myself, that will always change. They might not change their interest, but I might. Actually, I probably will. I’ve done it a gazillion (okay, maybe exaggerating a bit) times. I start a blog on a topic I AM SURE IS THE THING. After awhile I get bored and stop. Now, I do have to admit, part of this boredom and subsequent stoppage can be worked on. Because I seem to be circling back around to a core interest group of things. What’s changing is a day to day interest. I find I cannot limit myself to one topic or I’m hooped. Then I feel bad about myself for not sticking to things. For not seeing them through. For not committing. (Argh…want to know how to really push my buttons, tell me I can’t commit to anything. Which, I will hopefully remind myself before I fall apart that I DO commit to things. Things that really matter, like the raising of my children. I’ve totally committed to them. To a fault, probably.)
It’s Never Too Late
Hey. I’m 55. You’d think I’d have figured this all out by now. But in a world of specialists and a society that says you have to BE some one thing, and stick with it, be secure, and the Emilie Wapnick’s and Barbara Sher’s haven’t been found until today, and the fact that my life and all the things I’ve done and the kids that have come between, well, I’m probably right on track. And it’s NEVER too late. Never ever.
I pressure myself to find a way to make a living that does not involve my commitment to a desk job (current reality) or poverty (past reality). An article on making money as a multipod on Emilie Wapnick’s website Puttylike has given me hope. I am evolving. I am changing up my online presence to make more sense. To me. I can’t commit to being someone’s creativity “coach”. I can’t. It doesn’t sit right for me. I’m all for you being a coach, if that’s what you have chosen. I would just feel so bad to bail on people! I know enough about myself that that would probably happen. And I’m sorry, but I’m also not sorry. I’m 55. I’m not apologizing for who I am anymore. Or doing my best not to. (it’s a work in progress)
Give Your Gifts
I love lots of stuff. People, humanity, my offspring, of course. That goes without saying. I LOVE so much more. And I haven’t found a way to GIVE it. But I think I might be getting closer. By the day. I love writing, knitting, crochet, art journalling, mixed media, sewing, hiking, dogs, cats (well…we tolerate each other), I care about homelessness, equality, owning our power, being creative, making a difference, making one’s life COUNT for something. NONE. OF. THIS. is reflected in my current desk job. With the exception of equality, I suppose. My current job served a purpose. It was to get me off the social welfare system I miraculously crashed into (I’ll tell that story some day) for two months. Life has not been dull.
The point is, there is more to me than what I am currently giving to society. I KNOW I have gifts that I’m sitting on and it’s frustrating the hell out of me. And I can’t sit on them any longer. My best friend’s Mama is dying. Probably today, but we don’t know. I could be gone tomorrow. So could you. Life is short and we have to keep asking the RIGHT questions of ourself, of the Universe, or God or Goddess or whatever you want to call the Unseen/All Knowing. And, most importantly, LISTEN for the answers.
I was reading a person’s comment on Facebook in a group I belong to. She was speaking my words. Someone responded about being a Scanner, and Barbara Sher and Emilie Wapnick. BREADCRUMBS, people! The signs are everywhere. I followed the breadcrumbs, watched Emilie’s TEDx talk, found her Facebook presence, found her website and READ. Boom. My answers have been given.
Vulnerabilities as Strengths
The recurring theme in my life the past few weeks has been based on an art journal piece I did “Your vulnerabilities are your strength”. Up until then, I was giving it a lot o’ lip service. I plopped the page up on my wall so I would see it every night and every morning. It has been watching over me as I sleep. I wanted to know what it really meant, and what it really meant for me. It has led to a cascade of thoughts, ideas and potentials. I kept the question forefront in my mind. What does that mean for me and my life and career? What does it mean?
I know now. It means I’m a multipod. And I’m okay. What I once thought was a vulnerability is actually my strength. Emilie says our three top skills are:
- Idea Synthesis
- Rapid Learning
Those are strengths, my friend, if I ever saw them. And I have them. And I’m about to use them to their fullest. Watch me go.
In Love and Life,